Lately

Lately I've been hard at work revising my essay Center of Man and it's coming along nicely. I'm sure, by the end of the essay, it will perhaps be longer, better written, and completely different. I'm planning on taking out the gem metaphors and probably using construction metaphors, since I thought those types of metaphors would be neater in this essay. I could probably get to work revising more of my essays in the future, but the way I'm actually revising this current essay is like cutting it out bit by bit and reworking it into a blueprint. it's a little weird of a way to revise an essay, i know this, i said that to myself the day I got started revising it, but whatever it takes, my most meaningful essay shall never again be a mockery of my writing skills!

As for my last blog entry, I know it sounded a little angry and to be honest, I was very angry with myself and with everything I have done while I was writing. Why I made a rant about human sexuality was just to vent my frustrations of sexual orientations out and I did kind of need something to angrily rant about and that was the first thing that came to mind since sexual orientation is a hugely unnecessary controversy in this country alone. The thing is, if you love someone or something, no one should be able to judge that, not even the law itself. Sure, pedophilia and bestiality are both weird ways to get your motors going, but still, if you love someone, love them. Just that you can't expect to hold a meaningful relationship with a parrot or a 5-year old kid. It's just impossible, really.

Later all,

Yours Truly

Here's what I think

Okay, I have to get this off my chest and right now at this very moment, I am very angry with myself. Apparently my writing does indeed suck and now I am very well aware of it. Now I am going to just say that I'm putting away the pen, hanging up the coat, putting it all away. I can see now that life as a philosopher will not be at all beneficial to me. The only way to make a way through this dank world is to make money anyway. The world does not need a positive change and it most certainly does not need me especially to hold its hand and guide it to a positive light. I'm no one as I am now well aware. My writing is literally laughable, I don't see anyone looking at my writing and saying 'Well gee, what have I been thinking about all my life? this guy's totally right, I want to shake his hand". No, instead, the real reaction is a laugh, a giggle, a sly smirk, a conniving grin and the phrase "Holy crap, is this guy for real? This sucks balls!" I know this is terrible, this entire blog's terrible and I started it thinking it could be a good hobby and it could be something fun for myself, but no, this has turned into a realization of my failures, my beloved philosophy compilation book ever pleasing masses of people will be for naught, ever hoping to inspire a younger generation mankind do do good will be for naught, ever making a way in this world and landing a place in literary history is impossible now since anyone can write a book except me.

As for human society, they're all full of themselves and stuck up. They're all saying things like 'homosexuality is an abomination' or 'incest is immoral and disgusting'. Well sex itself is disgusting, be it heterosexual, homosexual, between a man and a child, a woman and her son, a man and corpse or a woman and a freaking bull! Sex is entirely disgusting and any relationship stemming from or towards it should be viewed as disgusting. But it isn't. Society has told you all that homosexuality and all of that other stuff is disgusting, but sex that is meant for the creation of another life is the only beautiful thing in this world. Society has basically told us that we as humans should only ever be attracted to a very, very small part of the globe. In other words, men should only be attracted to women that are not of their own heritage, that are their age or at least within five or ten years of their own age and women should be attracted to men in the same way. you humans can't help but think this a lot of the time, this is why gay marriage is such a big issue in America, because society told you homosexuality was wrong and this and that, get over it. I would say religion, namely the monotheistic religions, also had a hand in the way society thinks but what do I care? My opinion is irrelevant. Religion is nothing more than a mental crutche that is completely unnecessary in this day and age. Bottom line here is: Sex itself is disgusting and humans need to accept the fact that they're all disgusting animals and can't help what they're attracted to and that it's not anyone else's business to correct these people of their nonexistent wrongs.

As for philosophy and transcendentalism, I'm still deeply fascinated by it and I do wish to continue my education after high school to learn more of it, but I just can't make it my life's work, bagging at a grocery store will apparently be my life's work.

There you have it, I'm just going to stop being hopeful and take everything and tell everything just exactly how it is, because no one wants to listen to my garbage.

Making progress

I've noticed something rather interesting over the past two days in school, readers. I think that somehow I may be making astounding progress in my reeducation. Yesterday I was able to convey a valid point during journalism class yesterday. Today I was able to joke around effortlessly with everyone there as well. I do not know if this is actual progress or what, but I feel that this may be a cause for slight celebration. A golf clap, if you will, readers? Yes, so this will probably be a short update on what is going on right now. Monday I will see if this is actual progress being made. If I go up to people and start talking to them without shaking up, it will definitely be progress and in great strides too.

Hoping for more progress,

Yours Truly

Crumbling America day 4: Also a change somewhere

On Body Piercings: How mutilating the body will destroy our nation.... Somehow

Piercings to me always looking like these individuals were making themselves out to be human pin cushions. To me, the amount of piercings on a person's body also told of the level of sanity within that said individual. Say for instance that a person were to have four piercings on each ear. I would say that person is possibly a little crazy. The position of a piercing also tells of the level of sanity to me too, if you have a piercing on your eyebrow, I'd get you a therapist, if you have seven piercings on your eye brow, I would check you into a mental hospital because at that point, i would be worried for your sanity. Also nose piercings are something I have always disliked. Something about me throws them off. In cartoons, I always thought a bull would be the only thing to have a nose piercing considering in the cartoons I'd watch that had bulls, they would be hulking beasts of brute strength and comically short tempered in my opinion. When I saw humans with nose piercings for the first time, I literally thought 'What's that person doing trying to be a bull?". Such was my younger, pre-transcendental mind. Then I found out about other piercings on the body and I was simply disgusted by this idea that people could get what appears to me to be a tiny point metal rod shoved through these parts of their bodies that don't need to be....bedazzled like a pair of jeans being handled by a clinically insane girl with a bedazzlement gun thingy whatever they're called...
Now, when it comes to the ear lobes being pierced just once on each side, that's fine to me, I respect earrings because they have always been around civilizations.....or at least that's what Hollywood says....I do not wish to research something as stupid as earrings in the ancient world. Aside from that, earrings to me can be pretty sometimes. As for lip piercings, do not get me started on those. For starters, they always looked to me like that person got the receiving end of an otherwise horrible fishing accident. Also, how could anyone hope to be able to kiss anyone with a pierced lip? As for tongue piercings, It always makes me squeamish to see them. I rather like my own tongue and I rather like tasting the things I like eating, and I also enjoy talking too, however rare that would be. However, my generation and other generations behind my generation seem to like the idea of mutilating their body with tiny metal pointy objects and that to me somehow spells doom for the nation. Imagine if you are employed by a lazy dour-looking person with his eyebrows lined with tiny rings, his ears bedazzled with pierces, a few lip piercings and maybe a nose and a tongue piercing, would you rather work for that man? I'd rather punch him in the face because I could not possibly stand to look at him directly or withstand the intense urges to punch him in the face however painful punching a face full of metal could be. Instead, I would rather be employed by a person whose pants were worn correctly and so on and so forth from personal image. This is unfortunately all I have for this blog update, but this one's a first for me.

A word from the writer:

This update's a first for me, considering the essay, Crumbling America is being changed to the more sophisticated sounding The Destruction of a Once Great Nation. With that said, the segment on body piercings was started last June nearing the end of the school year and was only one sentence in in my philosophy compilation book so the entire segment you've just read was entirely pulled from my mind so of course it was witty and clever this time around because I am usually witty and clever even though in this blog, I've probably never made it out that I was witty, clever and sarcastic. As for my piece on why I am so anti-social, that was an essay written clearly with being published to this blog in mind. You could come up to me at any point in time and even ask me to see the original essay in its hand written form and it will sure enough be all or mostly the same as in the blog. It's something I'd like to call, a DTB, Direct To Blog essay. Perhaps i will write more DTBs in the future? perhaps not, goodness knows what I have in store. I could probably assure you that The Destruction of a Once Great Nation day 5 will certainly be a DTB simply because I do not have any pens with erasable ink that I specifically wanted at the beginning of the school year because I insist on using pens with erasable ink to write in my philosophy compilation book and not pencil because my book is always being taken out and being put into my book bag and the pages are always being turned and somewhere, somehow, anything I have written with pencil lead, smears the pages and obscures the hand written text. Day 5 will also be my take on the rise in crime rate unless I go back and read my book and find that I was terribly out of place and may have skipped a couple sections and include those sections in the coming days.

I hope you liked it,

Yours Truly

Talking about philosophy

I wanted to let you readers in on other fields of philosophy that I knew about. Here are three others that I know about.

Physicalism

Dualism


Idealism

First of, physicalism is the sole idea that the mind is within the body and that it is physically in your brain, key word there, physical. Most of my ideas about the human mind come from this field of philosophy.

Second is dualism, the idea that the mind is in a completely separate realm from your body. This idea sort of goes in with the transcendentalists' beliefs. A transcendentalist believes that the mind transcends the human body and that it is more spiritual in nature. This isn't what I believe because of science even though I'm a transcendentalist by all other accounts so I can basically say I'm 95% transcendentalist.

Idealism. Idealism is the philosophy field in which it is solely based on ideas, no matter how far-fetched or how close to home they are. My first essay was based on the understandings and principles of idealism as I had called it an idealist essay before since I had not yet proclaimed myself to be a transcendentalist.

There you go readers. A little crash course on three fields of philosophy that I at least have the gist of. Feel free to look more into them on your own time, I encourage it. They're good stuff.

Later friends,

Yours Truly

Another wacky dream

I realize that this is quickly turning into my dream blog....

I took a nap about an hour ago, during that nap, I had a very strange dream. It started when I was leaving the high school, but I was very scoial, I said "Bye" to just everyone I saw. As I was leaving the school building and walking down a set of stairs, I became consciously aware of my dream. I was thinking to myself "Am I dreaming right now? Is this a continuation of the dream with the Asian killer?". Split second later, I'm in a guy's house, and I opened a door to this long room. The room was filled with shades of blue. And I remember smelling gas in the room. I knew it was gas because it smelled exactly like the gas used by the gas stoves in the culinary lab in the school. I was going through the room and I noticed that there was a group of people all sitting on the floor and their faces expressed fear. What I knew was that a man named Erik Richards was the owner of the house I was in and I was there to see him. Among the group was the man that was to be Erik Richards and my brother. They were hostages of a man as the end of the room, where my brother was sitting and he was sitting near the wall nearest the door and he had some sort of contraption that let off sparks and to his left, was a pipe thing that was leaking the gas and my brother told me to get down and that the man was Erik's brother and he was crazy. I knew I wasn't putting up with another hostage situation so I decided to crawl over to the guy and pull on the gas pipe thing and I remember how it felt sort of warm as well and it had that hard kind of plastic feel too it. Then I pulled on it, backed away, got up and booked to the door, opened it, got out and quickly closed the door behind me, I was snickering and for some reason I high tailed it out of a long hall way and screamed "Help! Fire!" as I was running and I got to a glass door that from what I could see, led to a wooden gate and I open the door and put my leg over the gate in an attempt to jump the gate, but I quickly debated whether or not to jump because I did not look over the gate to see how high it was, so I decided not to, then I remember casually going into a room where it had a huge TV that had something on, I could quite tell, but here was this young girl with a cat and so I said hell to her and she said "Hi" and introduced herself as Helen Richards, which it then clicked in my mind that this girl was Erik Richards' daughter, but what amazed me was that she knew that her father was trapped with his brother in another room of the building, and slowly being gassed alive. I don't even think she ever bothered making a telephone call to emergency services to get help either because she knew that her father was being held hostage in his own home because at the last moment of my dream, she told me "Erik... is burning" in the most nonchalant of tones I've ever heard and I was even petting the cat and noticing how soft its fur was. Then the dream just faded out like a film burning away and it got dark, then I woke up.

Why didn't Helen do anything? If the door was unlocked, why didn't everyone gang up and beat up Erik's brother and get out of there to have him arrested by the law enforcement? Why was I so easily able to socialize if I was consciously aware of myself during the dream? Did I make things worse by pulling on the gas pipe? Why did I yell like an idiot while snickering and running down that hallway? Why was I just casually talking to Helen Richards when she and I both could have gotten together to get help? Why was I even sensually aware in my dream? How was I able to feel everything around me so vividly and realistically?

I will never know. But that was one heck of a dream, readers.

Until next time everyone,

Yours Truly

Anti-socialness and me

A good and proper amount, or even most, maybe even all of you have perhaps wanted to know why I am so anti-social. Thus, I will try my best to inform you all so that you could understand my problems with opening up. I may be going a bit too far out of my way with this update, but this is my blog and I will say what I want, it's just your job to read it.
Firstly, I believe that my anti-social behavior came about when I moved from my early childhood home, which is completely understandable, considering I was very young and I was leaving my friends behind and never going to see them again. Now, I realize that when I moved, I also left that very important part of my life, considering a person's childhood may be very important to them and everything and my early childhood is what I consider to be my real childhood, basically infant to maybe 5 or 7, and that's my childhood. Back on the subject of my childhood, I distinctly remember that when I was younger, I was exponentially more social and I consider my social skills, looking back on the little bits and fragments that I remember of my childhood, to be very good, if not normal for a young child. You see, I would talk to everyone I saw and I was carouse the other children around me and I had absolutely no problem with opening up. I remember I was able to hold a conversation with a friend of mine on an entire bus ride to my pre school, something I could never dream of doing today. Even now, to this very day, I consider my childhood to be the very best years of my life.
Secondly, I believe that once I was put on medications to control my hyperactivity(Yes, as calm as I may seem, I have hyperactivity issues), it made it exceedingly difficult to open up again. I also believe that the effects onf the medications that I took over the rest of my life since then, rendered me a little too calm. Again, I may be horribly mistaken, and I am sure that my mother and my grandmother could correct me on this, but I have only one person to blame for all of this, and that is myself.
Third, I believe that I am considerably anti-social and self-contained due to a possibility that maybe I just grew up too fast for my own good. I just believe that I can not make a connection with any sort of teenager near me at all. One, because what teenager today wants to debate the causes of all of the world's leading problems in today's society? Two, what teenager today laments nature's receding bounties> Come on! The rain forest is a beautiful wonderland of nature at its fullest and mankind is ruining it because of its greed. Three, what teenager today even cares, at all, about philosophy. transcendentalism especially? Four, in school, now, I solely wish to focus on myself, my academics and my reeducation of socializing and opening up to the world, so I don't care about making friends with anyone just yet, I have a long way to go. Also, I want to focus on my academics. I know, it's a bit of a shock to you readers, but I do want to do schoolwork now.
Finally, to conclude this update, I feel that I became socially inept because I moved to a new place that totally sucks because most of the kids talk slang and listen to hip hop and want to sell drugs and this and that, al life on medications to control hyperactivity which made me too calm, as well as my own interests being too mature for a normal teenager to comprehend or give a crap about are at least some of the facts as to why I currently distance myself from humanity in person. Although there is a very clear part of me with the strong wish to be able to effectively communicate with others just as I had when I was a small child in preschool. It is a fact of life to have to interact with others and I can not make my dream living going around talking like Stephen Hawkings on a computer because I no longer feel comfortable speaking to people in person. I want to be able to hold pleasant conversations with others, I really do, but it is just out of my reach. This is exactly why this school year, I will make every bit of effort to try and reeducate myself into being able to interact with my peers without feeling completely nervous and stumbling on my words, which I do all of the time when a teacher is talking to me and the class is especially listening in on me talking. Although today in health class, the class went over their goals in life and when it was my turn, I didn't feel nervous at all reading my goals aloud, I didn't feel anything at all, I must be making progress. The world does want to listen to me, but it is only that I can not tell it what it needs to hear.

Thank you for reading,

Yours Truly

Just because...

Readers, by now you must, or must not have been wondering what my plans will be for the next year of my free schooling. Let me just say I have a lot of things I wish to do for my last year of free schooling.

1. I wish to be diligent in my academics during the school year and try not to be lazy at all. It will certainly be hard for me to do, but I must do it this year so I can at least get an actual nod from a college and not spam and junk mail. I wish to major in philosophy and English writing in college and the only way to get this is if a college paid me because I am quite simply, flat broke to begin with.
2. Continue my work on the school newspaper. Simply put, there is still much that I could do for the club and I wish to continue doing it.
3. Go into the talent show. Last year's show was horrendously awful and narrowed to the width of a hair if I must say. All the talent show has been since it started was singing and dancing. The first year it was begun, it had freaking magician and a band performance for crying out loud! I wanted to compete last year but I thought it was cancelled and therefore didn't bother signing on another time because I thought it would have been redundant. I must do this this year because of the fact that I do not want to sit by and turn my hearing aids off from bad singing. I want to inspire a new group of youths to take up the mantle of writing and philosophy, to do this, I must channel my inner transcendentalist and create a speech worthy of lasting memories and profound impacts on the school.
4. Obtain a summer job. I wish to work at six flags for the summer because I wish to buy myself a laptop computer just to have the freedom of usage that goes with it. As of now, I am using a desktop computer and it suits me just fine.
5. Keep up my work in my philosophy compilation book. Yes, the book I was seen all over the school last year scribbling in is my most precious possession, as it is my real voice. Thus, I must be diligent with my work in this book as well if I wish to compile it all into a book that I can unleash onto an unsuspecting public.
6. Interact for once in my no good life. The career I yearn for requires social skills of which I do not possess at this very moment. With that being said, I must try my hardest to connect with people of my age group which would be a very arduous task indeed. How many teenagers do you know today, who aspire to be philosophers or even know what the heck philosophy even is? Most teenagers these days want to go into crime and sell drugs or sell off their own bodies for prostitution and don't give a flying doo-da-day about the world around them and what they could possibly do to change it with their own power.

That should be a good set of goals to acquire for someone as self-contained, shy and anti-social as I am. I really do look forward to the next school year anyway, considering it will be something to do besides nothing.

Until then,

Yours Truly

What I could actually do!

This might seem or sound crazy to you readers, but believe me when you read this, I may be able to write my very own book!

Believe it or not, on a restless Saturday evening through to an even more restless Sunday morning, I was watching one of my favorite television shows on the CBS show "Late Late Show with Craig Ferguson" and Craig actually gave me a really good idea on how to write a book that every probably did anyway. Just start a book by writing a page a day. By the end of the year, you'll have a book, or as one of my previous teachers would call it: A "Juicy book" since it would be so thick and savory I'd bet. Thus, I'm drawn to the conclusion that starting.....maybe very soon....I will start writing my very own philosophy compilation book! It may not be following in the exact foot steps of my transcendentalist heroes, but it's a step in their direction! Perhaps on my status update informing you readers on Facebook about this blog entry, you could help me out by submitting idea I could use for my compilation book. Let's work together and produce a wonderful book by next....somewhere in August!

By the way, I'm having a very relaxing summer not doing anything. This must be what the kids who put out effort all during their school years must feel over their summer breaks. In September, I have plenty of goals in mind: Don't slack off in the slightest, try and do things ahead of time, rejoin the newspaper club, get into the talent show and stay in it, work more literary magic across the school and get passing, decent grades! Also pass that friggin' HSPA math portion too....

Have a nice rest of the summer,

Yours Truly

I'm so confused now

I just sat here at the computer I use and as I stared at my cat, Gabby, I was thinking about writing this entry into this blog. I will tell you readers that I am a man with a love of two things: Writing, and Anime. Ever since I was seven years old I've been deeply fascinated and super glued to the culture of Japanese animation. Writing has fueled an amazing writing talent in stories, essays and poems while anime has fueled my more productive imagination. Clearly, I have much interests in a prominent writing career, but I'm honestly more interested and motivated by anime, truthfully. Every time I think for a while, anime pops into my mind, every time I close my eyes, I envision completely original anime characters, I sleeplessly stay up on Saturday nights after midnight to temporarily satiate my television anime desire, sometimes I even read manga to pass time on the internet. In truth, I'm far more interested in anime than I am writing.

Now as I think about it, when I am able to obtain my writing career, I might not exactly be happy with it. Sure, I will always have anime and manga to lift my spirits, but will I truly be happy with being an author of some sort? You would probably recommend I try and work as a writer for anime magazines like Shonen Jump! or try to learn Japanese kanji so I can make a living translating manga, or something. I think if I can somehow combine both of my great interests to be an anime screen writer or something then I would truly be happy with my job. Of course, what kind of Japanese animation studio would want a lowly American like me? Of course, why should I matter anyway? I am just as I am. A young transcendentalist who just can not seem to find a proper place in the world. I am the type of person most college quizzes would find better suited for working in religious places when I am an atheist. I just have no idea. I love writing, but I might not be happy with it, I love anime, but I might never find a job that deals with it every day.

Of course, you might say to me by now: "Ryan, stop giving up on your hopes and dreams! You're a truly gifted and talented young man." True, I seem very gifted and talented, but you should know that I spent pretty much the entirety of my life dreaming up dreams and crushing those dreams myself only to dream of other dreams to be crushed as well. I once wanted to be an entrepreneur and own my own restaurant business, but that would require cooking and constant financial stuff, crap I'll never have the brains or patience for. I even wanted to host my own television show! Something I could never do because if it got popular, it would require talking with people and meeting new people, something I'll probably never be good at. I'll just probably waste away my life waiting tables at a crappy run down diner for all of my life anyway. After all, I have to face the harsh reality some times and that just might be my reality. I'm just a child that dreams way too big.

Later,

Yours Truly

Saved from the light.... The oh so annoying light

A few days ago I deleted everything I ever knew about christian rock on my beloved Pandora radio account. I liked that it was nice and I could listen to it casually, but then I just wanted to listen to Flyleaf on there and as I discovered bands like Halestorm and In This Moment, the christian music that I once enjoyed just got boring and most importantly, way too annoying. All Christian Rock music is is "Don't lose your faith, God loves you" "God is the answer to everything" "Jesus will save us all". Yeah, you guys keep telling yourselves that while you stupidly preach about a fairy tale story book character that's most likely to be a stupid alien researcher rather than some almighty presence of unknown origin. As you readers know, I am a proud atheist because the idea of a God or a higher presence is just too far fetched to believe. Why you might as? Well which one of you dogmatically believes in Santa Claus? Yeah, exactly. So as Christian Rockers always say, when you're struggling with your faith, keep it and you'll have an invisible lover. No, don't. Lose it already, you'll do yourself a whole lot of good and whole crap ton of knowledge, truth and reasoning will just dump onto you. What I did with my Pandora account was just make a new radio that seeded from Halestorm and In This Moment, so I can still enjoy those two bands without all the stupid fairy tale character bull crap that christian rock always spews out. To think I even liked listening to that junk.

Oh, yes, I'm listening to Classical too,

Yours Truly

I've Changed

The following piece of literature basically a sort of letter addressing my childhood as a beloved old friend. This little thing is something that came to me when I was sitting here and thinking of things. So please, have your respect for me, the writer:

I've changed since we last met.

I've grown up a bit.

I've lost my faith in religion.

I saw through the lies that plagued this world.

I've decided on an excellent and rewarding career path.

I've discovered a new part of me.

I toyed with my own emotions. Even once thought of dying.

I went through depression.

I saw the rights and wrongs of humanity.

I spent days thinking long and hard about the life ahead of me.

There are still times when I try to remember you.

I know our time together was short, but it was very special.

I can only remember you in tiny fragments.

I miss you, dear friend.

We are victims of time, and I know this very well.

We'll each get older, you, farther in my past.

Time will pass by the both of us.

I'll still miss you. Always.

We never said our "Good Bye"-s.

I'll just cherish our time together, and the tiny fragments I still remember.

Wasn't that great?

Yours Truly

Crumbling America: day 3

On The Government

With the country being in a recession, the country's already in shambles economically and today's people just do not approve of the government. As a matter of fact, as long as I could remember, people have not approved of the government. When a country's government is no longer approved of by the people, it already spells doom for a nation, just like many in the middle east. I for one believe that America's current government is an okay government. Mostly because we haven't overthrown it yet, so it must be doing just fine. Most people today are just frustrated and I can see that. They have probably lost their jobs, they're upset over the riding gas and food prices and the government today just has not done good enough to be approved.
I just do not desire to see this country ran into an anarchy in my lifetime and with the predictions seen in "Earth 2100", it may just be a possibility, unfortunately. It is true that there have been many other democracies that have risen and collapsed, all just under their own sheer weight. I do not want to see this country suffer the same fate in the future. It would certainly be a devastating constant disaster.

Next segment: On teen pregnancy and one-parent

families

See you next times,

Yours Truly

"Earth 2100" response

I stayed up from one in the morning to 3 in the morning to watch a tear jerking, heartrending tale of Lucy, a fictional character born on January the first of the year 2009 and lives to 2100 and she narrates a story of her life during that period, with skyrocketing gas prices, global warming, global population explosions and declines with famine, disease, wasted resources and rising sea levels. The people in the documentary wanted for it to be a wake-up call to Earth to get moving to save the planet since we have the technology to save our lives. I want to live to ripe old age to see Earth prosper in an eco-friendly and enriched environment, I want to die a happy man, I want to know that Earth will continue to host life long after I have become oil. I do not want to die an unhappy and distraught old man who was trying to live in an America that has collapsed under its own weight due to its lack of resources and crazy weather patterns. I want to die knowing I have left a legacy in literacy that will be enjoyed by millions and taught in schools worldwide. I urge you my readers to take a stand and help save our Earth. I want to live to 2100 myself and see to it that Earth made itself out for the prosperity for our future generations to come.

Along with Global health, I would like to see Global Unity. I want to see all of the human race band together, a collapse in religion, an end to unjust hatred and war, I want to leave this Earth seeing that. Let us come together and work to make that happen,

Save our Earth,

Yours Truly

Summer!

I know I have been out for a while now. About five days now, but I am on summer break and I don't plan on doing any dang thing for this summer. I just want to chill out at home and relax all summer long. Then again, that stupid summer reading book's got to get done anyway. But other than that, nothing to do this summer. I will get the next part of Crumbling America out tomorrow, hopefully, I can't guarantee that at all.

Later friends,

Yours Truly

Crumbling America: Day 2

On The Tattoo Craze

To me, tattoos were a way to rebel against a parent generation quietly. Tattoos were something that disgusted me in some way. They never intrigued me at all. I always found them to be artistic blotches of skin with money spent stupidly.These things called popular culture are nothing more than just another form of stupidity and degrading morality in this crumbling nation. Tattoos can never be washed away and I continually fear that tattoos will never wash away from today's mindset and the next generations to come. Continuing affections and obsessions over tattoos in my opinion may be a factor in leading to a future of lawlessness and even more violence than now. Some day, anything a child does may just be motivated by the parent. To think, older generations remember their own parents beating them senseless over even dying their hair, now everyone does it on a daily basis. Tattoos? Sure, parents may still throw children down a set of stairs for that, but it's becoming a common occurrence and it just may deteriorate this very nation.

Next entry:
On The Government

My company sponsored dream

Last night I had the most bizarre dream to date. I dreamt that I was walking around some sort of supermarket and I was going to all of these Coca-Cola machines and every time I opened a door to get one, the bottle was either too warm, the seal was broken, it was partially drank or whatever. I spent the whole entire dream searching up and down the store fingering through Coke bottles trying to get the right one and I never did. I have no idea why I was dreaming about having an unlucky adventure trying to buy a decent bottle of Coke when I don't even drink it all that often.

Still scratching my head about it,

Yours Truly

Doubts: Volume 1

Here I have my doubts. I now have doubts of the glorified upper class success I have always vividly dreamed of accomplishing. Although my life is long and I believe in my work, there is no divinity in my writing. I could perhaps writed hundreds of books in my lifetime, but each book may just end up being a waste of my own embittered time. I could go to school as long as I wish, but maybe I could never reach prosperity, maybe I will be sentenced to the poorer harsher life without money and with many broken dreams I could easily accomplish. Never will I snap the reigns of hard work and dedication to move the horses of success. Here I have my doubts. Here, reality will lock the wondrous chest of fantasy.

Explanation: This whole Doubts series was just meant to take up extra space in my compilation book and was written with intentions of being read directly from the book itself. Now, the Doubts series captures the evolution of my doubts of achieving greatness. The whole basis of the series is to somehow poetically explain to the reader my doubts of ever accomplishing anything in my life.

Later friends,

Yours Truly

Life update

Lately I've been sick and this was most of the course of my spring break mind you. Just now I have started recovering and all that. As of late though, I have been putting everything off and I apologize, I will get back on track with blog updates, especially my new essay which I can not write more of since I am officially out of pens and I only write in my philosophy compilation book with pens. I will also do a Doubts volume some time tomorrow. I have no idea. I can not even promise that.

Music

I know this is supposed to be a philosophical blog and stuff, but let me just review to you readers the music I like. As of late, I have great interest in hard rock, goth rock, and now a fading interest in Christian rock. I had strong interest in the good clean lyrics of Christian rock and the good messages stored in the songs, but I am getting bored of almost every song I listen to about a struggle to keep faith. In my opinion, if you are struggling to keep your own faith for whatever reason, just give it up. Saves you the struggle that way. However, I have found superb interest in women fronted bands. I must say, these women know how to sing. Now would be the time to say a sexist joke, but most of my fanbase is female so I can not.

So here it is now. A list of the female fronted bands I currently enjoy.

1. Halestorm-Got interested in them yesterday and I'm already hooked. They're a good example of Pandora Radio coming along with something great. After seeing videos by the band this morning, I can say now that Halestorm is the female version of the Veer Union, my current favorite band right now.
2. Fireflight-A Christian band to say the least. About a year ago, I got completely obsessed with them on Pandora(Back when it was totally free) and now I like them just a bit. I hear them constantly on Pandora anymore. I'm comparing them to Default, over-listened, but still just as enjoyable

3. The Birthday Massacre-Goth rock band. I'll listen to them whenever I feel like getting creeped out with music. Seriously, the station I got reserved for them pumps out some creepy crap sometimes. No comparison to any favorite male bands though. If I come across a creepy male fronted band, I'll let you know.

4. In This Moment(ITM for short)-Heavy hitting hard rock baby! Sometimes metal too. I only like just a few of their songs but they're always enjoyable every time they come onto Pandora. For that, I'm gonna say they're my female Sevendust. I only like a few songs from Sevendust, so it works out.
5.Flyleaf-They're like my Nickelback really. I've listened to them entirely too much just like Nickelback and I'm getting bored of both bands but both still have my fandom anyway. They're all great people, why give them up cause I'm bored of their music?

So that's a good example of girl power right there. Maybe I will have a post on Easter. Won't that be fun? Free candy!

Free candy for Easter!

Yours Truly

My brain writes suspense thrillers

I just woke up from part two of a very weird dream I had not too long ago. In the last dream, I was running around a huge building that seemed to me to be just all width, the ground it covered appeared to be huge and it was an arrangement of buildings that all looked identical. Why I was running around these buildings was to get away from some kind of deranged maniac(Who I'm still trying to figure out why he's Asian) who wants to kill me or hold me hostage or something. The last part, I was running through a building that had a whole maze of corridors, then I got outside and began to run at top speed, which somehow appeared to not exactly be very fast and the maniac got me, I woke up.

In this part it was a huge suspense thriller. The dream started out where I appeared to be in a sort of doctor's office. It had that all-familiar sort of table with the all familiar very noisy white paper covering and a couple of chairs, a doctor stool, a counter lined with supplies(Although the supplies were strewn all over the counter), and then there was me. I was apparently sitting through the deranged maniac having slit a guy who was apparently a comrade of mine. I never saw his face since all he was was hunched over and covered in blood. Next to me there was a woman who was apparently my other comrade. She yelled at the maniac a bit and kicked him in the face, then he left the room and I saw a golden opportunity to bolt out of there and call for help. I was running through the familiar carpeted hall that was a navy blue with the familiar green wall for a bit until when I was just about to arrive at a sliding door outside, I heard someone call to the psychotic Asian killer that I had ran away, then I quickly flung open the door and would have taken the same route as last time had I found that there was another building just over from where I left. I ram to the glass door of the other building which appaeared to be a waiting froom since from what I saw it was just a room filled with chairs and there was a very tall man in the room and I pounded the heck out of the door and screamed "Let me in!" And the guy does and just as I get in, the maniac comes in right after me, I turn to see him coming up behind me and I wake up.

Oh man! Talk about cliffhanger! I still want to know what happened! Did I get caught? Did the guy there rescue me? Did I decide to grow a pair and face the maniac head on? The first thing I thought I should have done was wrestle the knife off the maniac and stab him in the head repeatedly. But more importantly, since I think my comrades and the killer and I were the only ones in the building during part two, why then did one of my comrades want to rat me out and give me to the killer before I can get help? Perhaps my comrades reflect true human nature in the fact that no one is to be trusted in this world? Or perhaps it was another person? This may be true because the voice that called to the maniac was clearly male and my female comrade was too busy crying and being upset and my male comrade was too busy dying to want to rat me out. Perhaps this killer that wanted me so bad was working with more people that have not been revealed? I do not know. Maybe if I can ever dream of a part three, everything will be revealed to me? Maybe it will end with a happy ending? Maybe the killer will kill me and have his last laugh? Maybe the tall gentlemen who let me in will aid me in requesting for police assistance? I have no idea, all I know is, these two dreams needed to be written down after what I just woke up from.

Until then,

Yours Truly

Crumbling America: Day 1

Opening

Reviewing the current state of mind in today's younger America, it has come to my attention that more and more sightings of such freakish acts of, in my opinion, desecration, America as a nation is deteriorating. As a member of a younger generation of today, I did not realize how seriously my generation is destroying this country. It is becoming traditional to see a one-parent family, pregnant teenagers, tattoos, piercings, and other forms of bodily mutations. Materialism is also becoming a top priority of my generation, a generation I'd describe as a generation of "I want, I want, I want". Though even before truly realizing this, I knew these acts had to have been frowned upon and that these may be problematic. However, it is apparent that sadly, my generation is spearheading a new social reform of lazy, uneducated, lawless American citizens and that this is part of a much larger, more serious situation leading to the total collapse of my, no, our beloved country.

Notes: What I just wrote was originally going to be one continuous piece, but when I was writing about tattoo culture, I decided to break the whole essay into pieces so it is easier to understand. The opening was written as my wake-up call in the aftershock of my history teacher's quick lesson on how bad my generation is. I was so moved by this that I had to get my response on paper as a sort of thanks to my teacher for opening my eyes to the dangers of human behavior(And for finally teaching me something too) and so, that was the opening. The next one will come tomorrow as well as volume one of my Doubts series.

Next piece: On tattoo culture's growing approval.

Later,

Yours Truly

A story book

Just a few short hours ago, I decided that over the summer break I would try to write a fantasy story about a person standing up against a totalitarian empire. I'm not exactly sure what could go on in the book or anything, but I would like to call it a god challenge for me considering I'm used to writing essays now. It certainly has been quite a while since I last tried my hand at writing a story, so I would like to get your support my dear readers. Give me any suggestions you can. Together, we could make some magic with this story.

Short announcement

Tomorrow, I'll start releasing my latest essay in a daily basis. One part of it each day, then maybe I could also write down some of my volumes from the Doubts series. So look forward to the opening statement from my newest essay Crumbling America tomorrow.

See you soon,

Yours Truly

Center of Man: The essay

Center of Man: Instructions For The achievement Of Global Unity

At the center of man is anything and everything held dearly to one's own way of thinking. The center of one man is the true heart of everything. The belief in personal achievement is necessary for the advancement of progress in one's life and boils into the core beliefs to be upheld by every person and polished into the glittering luster that is that person's very epicenter. The person's true values are further refined and divided into three; true virtues, true beliefs, and true passions. Learning of one's three center gems provides the learner with ample understanding of the way one lives their life and what is always on their mind. Learning to understand another person's center beliefs, values and passions can help build an advancement towards the shining future of global. However, such an advancement can not be realized until we learn to understand our differences and view each other not as impugnant enemies, but as persons of an equal standing.

If we start today to believe in the best others and learn to stand on equal footing with one the other, we can begin this most glorious progress and convert this into into a peaceful, reasonable, intellectually equal reality. Within this reality there should be no more violence towards others differences, there should be no more prejudice, no more conflicts, and no more misunderstood hatred. If we reflect upon our own core values and reflect upon those of others, they may even be similar, and if two enemies think the same way, why should they fights? Only because they think the other is wrong. This will unfortunately always be true.
Then there is the problem of race. If every race can learn to love and respect the other, we can merge into the one race we all are, the human race. This is why I see no black, why I see no white, Asian, or Indian or whatever, because I have learned to view myself as equal with others. Regardless of appearance, social status, gender, or anything else that we as humans discriminate against each other with, we are the sole human race. We have destroyed any other human race that we met in the long past, so this is why we must view each other as equals, because we are the only race of humans left on Earth. For this reason we should never again fight amongst each other simply because we are all different. We shal unite as the one race we are and learn to understand each other. Only when the world settles down and follows these instructions will global unity shine in the horizon and the human race shal prosper in a world without armed conflict. For a world without armed conflict will be a world without serious danger. All of this can make littler, maybe even completely make sense, but who am I, or who are we to speak of such things? The answer is to open your eyes and look at the world around you as equal to you. Perhaps then we can make the impossible, possible and march towards a greater Earth.

Author's notes: I know this might have been crap. I do admit that I trailed off in some sentences to drive a real sensible point since I felt that those sentences didn't make too much sense. I also looked at the writing of the essay in my compilation book and did notice that I left out a few things too. I hope that even though it may not make a whole lot of sense and it may not be my personal best essay, but that you at least enjoy reading another one of my essays.

I know, it's going to be crap by the time you read this closing,

Yours Truly Anyway

New essay!

I am finally working on a new essay! it is titled Crumbling America.

(Stupid text thing was throwing fits on me, so please excuse the extensive amount of space.)


It was inspired by a teachable moment in my history class when something happened(I reallt was not paying attention since I wanted to get on with the class) that made my teacher stop everything to put up a slideshow showing how every student's behavior is wrong or what ever and that the country seems to be crumbling because of it. Tattoos becoming acceptable, bodily piercings being acceptable, teen pregnancies, massive declines in high school graduation, skyrocketing crime rates, all attributing to the death of our nation, so my new essay points these all out from my perspective. I hope once it's finished that it will be a remarkable read.

In other news:
I've just heard that the school based youth services program has officially been cut from the school so there is no talent show to go to, therefore, tomorrow, I will post the essay I had planned for publication on the second of June.

Later folks,

Yours Truly

Doubts Series

OK, I said on Facebook that I would talk about my new Doubts Series. Now I will talk about it. The doubts series is a sort of poetic explanation of my doubts about basically everything in my writings, taking up empty spaces in my philosophy compilation book. It all started when I started to doubt that I could get anywhere in life with my new passion for philosophy and I was flipping through my philosophy compilation book and noticed all of these empty unused pages that were meant for longer portions of works that I finished since I couldn't figure anything else out for them so I just wrote in the table of contents "Doubts Series" and then on a blank page meant, i started the first portion of the doubts series by writing my doubts of ever getting anywhere in life.

There it is folks,

Yours Truly

One more day...

One more day and I will throw something in school. One more day and I can celebrate my blog's one year anniversary. One more day of having to talk and I will kill someone. I do not care anymore. I have already had a good day torpedoed out of the water by becoming a diligent worker in my first period class and what happens? A simple answer to an otherwise simple question turns into a rumor spread about that I "told somebody off". One more day of this nonsense and my own version of doing that would be with my fists. I really hate people, I have hated them so much since moving to this crappy town of Burlington City in New Jersey, and I do believe I will continue to hate them until my grave. I know for a fact that I will never truly be alone in the world, that there are 7 billion people and they will always be here to bother me.

Hoping for a better day tomorrow,

Yours Truly

Center of Man(Finished)

Just today I finally put an end to the essay Center of Man. I'll get it published the day of my school's talent show, June 2nd for very special reasons. Until then, let's welcome in the month of March in the year of 2011, the very year of the rabbit, my very favorite animal. Also, today was a bit awkward, especially since yesterday in my art class, I got extremely angry at my class for laughing at me for sleeping so today they seemed skittish towards me. Yes, fear me! Fear me you pathetic excuses for human beings! Ha! Your pathetic existences are worth less than the gum that gets stuck to a child's shoe. That's all for now, my friends.

Later my friends,

Yours Truly

Global unity and Center of Man

Center of Man was originally set to be an essay explaining all things treasured by mankind, but now I trailed it off to be something even more powerful, an essay on the use of knowledge and understanding to create a global reformation of peace and unity. It is coming along well as such an essay and I think I will like it a lot once it's finished.

Be seeing you,

Yours Truly

Center of Man

I started work on it today and I like how the words flowed when I was writing it. I decided it would be about a person's core values, the understanding of others' core values, the progress of a person's core beliefs and how if we as the human race all learned to understand each other and see eye to eye with one another, we could begin a progress towards global unity. Doesn't that make for an interesting essay my readers? I hope it comes out good, well and long. I like writing lengthy essays now.

Later,

Yours Truly

February

My first post for the month of February. It's also black history month and that part of February, I couldn't give a crap about. I mean, I know it's black history and I like some of the figures from it and all, but it's just not me to get excited over something like that. I'm not saying I'm racist, I'm just asking what it has to do with me.

Still not a racist,

Yours Truly

The white blanket

Snow, snow, snow, snow, did I say it enough? Snow. To me, snow is beautiful. It's only when there's too much of it that becomes a problem. The snow today that closed my school's doors is a fine example of it being too much. Sure it's pretty, but hey, on a day like this, I'd much rather be at school then staying in the house doing nothing all day.

That's all we have time for today,

Yours Truly

Matter of fate or choice

When we envision life, we can see it as many different scenarios. However, when it comes to how we actually see life as it is, we tend to take two sides: fate, and personal choice. Others tend to believe it's all within their thoughts. Some individuals believe life is pulled by the strings of fate, others believe choice pulls life. Meanwhile, an increasing number of individuals believe that choice can steer fate. They believe that great individuals in history have practiced the technique of receiving their wishes through conscious and unconscious thoughts. Now, people all over the world believe the universe gives them whatever they desire through constantly thinking about it. The idea can be crossed over to the belief that when a person is in prayer, that God, not the universe, grants them their desires. Personally, I believe that life can indeed be a matter of personal freedom of choice, but life to me can be based on how we as individuals choose to live. It's all up to how someone chooses to believe how life is envisioned.

I know it's crap,

Yours Truly

An essay's finally coming

I finally finished an essay on how life works. It's short, sweet, and right to the point in my opinion. I'll probably publish it tomorrow or just whenever I get around to it. I do promise you readers that Matter or fate or choice will be published in the next post and it's also the last essay in chapter 1 of my philosophy compilation book. My next essay which was also created to be an article for my opinion column in my school's newspaper will be published once that gets published to the newspaper. Surely this essay will have the widest audience out of any of my essays so far. Pretty interesting must I say.

Later,

Yours Truly

Personal Justice

I do not know what will happen with that essay, but like Center of Man, we'll just have to wait and see because I still have my two page newspaper article to get done, and if it were to be an essay, it would be the longest continuous one ever! Four pages of my views on society today!

In other news, I've organized my philosophy compilation book a couple of days ago. Which means, all of the poems and essays you have seen published here, are all under chapter one of my book, called Getting started. The ones I am currently talking about are all under chapter two: Going deeper. It's pretty interesting to have a compilation of works all sorted into chapters. So far, I see my philosophy book as a way of tracking my records. Someday my readers, it shall be published and sold to the masses. Will you buy it?

See you for a post tomorrow,

Yours Truly

Center of Man

I decided that I could perhaps do an essay on what the title suggests. All things held ever so dearly to one's heart. It will be a truly groundbreaking essay for me. Taking on deeper and deeper ideas of humanity just seems to be my trend as of late. As for the actual essay, I really have no idea how I will be able to write an essay on such an incredible and meaningful topic as that. I hope it will be a good one myself.

Work on my article for the newspaper at my school is going quite smoothly. I took the day off from work today to read Walden, and it is fascinating so far. That man was truly a genius and I can not helped but be so mesmerized by his words in this very book. Perhaps when I'm done reading the book, I can dedicate a blog post to a review of it. Wouldn't you like that, my readers?

That's all,

Yours Truly